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Well, once I was persuaded to open up my head
I told them how it was and went and got it wrong instead
I said would you believe me if you only knew
I'd been stealing everything, this conversations through
And the boy cried hang him at three
I saw him on the front page laughing at me
He worked in a fairground in a tall hat
He's a liar, he's a liar and a good one at that
Say what you wanna, say what you will
Write your number on my telephone bill
Walk like a monkey, kick like a mule
I could be a beggar but I'd rather be just as cruel
So I told them all I could about what could they expect
But I lost my sense of smell and I gained my self-respect
They told me I was curious I told them they were slow
And they asked me were I get this stuff I told them I don't know
And the boy cried whoopi de dee
There's a woman with a mustache who won't let me be
She was born on a Monday, she's a hundred and four
She's a liar, she's a liar and a little bit more
Say what you wanna, say what you will
Write your number on my telephone bill
Walk like a monkey, kick like a mule
I could be your beggar but I'd rather be just as cruel
And the boy cried hang him at three
I saw him on the front page laughing at me
He worked in a fairground in a tall hat
He's a liar, he's a liar and a good one at that
Say what you wanna, say what you will
Write your number on my telephone bill
Walk like a monkey, kick like a mule
I could be a beggar but I'd rather be just as cruel
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