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I know there's never been a man, in the awful shape I'm in
I can't even spell my name, my head's in such a spin
Today I tried to eat a steak, with a big old table spoon
You got me chasin' rabbits, walkin' on my hands and howlin' at the moon
Well sugar I took one look at you, and it almost drove me mad
And then I even went and lost, what little sense I had
Now I can't tell the day from night, I'm crazy as a loon
You got me chasin' rabbits, pullin' out my hair and howlin' at the moon
Some friends of mine asked me to go, out on a huntin' spree
'Cause there ain't a hound dog in this state that can hold a light to me
I eat three bones for dinner today, then tried to tree a coon
You got me chasin' rabbits, scratchin' fleas and howlin' at the moon
I rode my horse to town today and a gas pump we did pass
I pulled him up and I hollered whoa and said, fill him up with gas
The man picked up a monkey wrench and wham he changed my tune
You got me chasin' rabbits, spittin' out teeth and howlin' at the moon
I never thought in this old world, a fool could fall so hard
But honey baby when I fell, the whole world must have jarred
I think I'd quit my doggish ways, if you take me for your groom
You got me chasin' rabbits, pickin' out rings and howlin' at the moon
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